Saturday, September 12, 2009

still here...

hmmm, it has been a while. Still here, still at it.

I have been feeling down all week. I go through this every fall. Daughter is back at school and I have to find my routine again on my own. I think it is hitting me harder because I know that she goes away after this year. And even though, as a parent I know I have to let her go, I hate that I do. I may go back to work. If I can find a job!!

One of the gals that walked occasionally with our walking group is losing her husband to cancer. Even as I type. He just moved into a hospice. It is just a matter of days. They had decided to deal with his illness by being very open with everyone. And given that it is the year 2009, most communications come via e-mail. I'm finding these e-mails harder and harder to read and deal with. Of course, I realize this is not about me in any way, and what this woman is going through, as well as her dying husband, I can't even imagine. But (and there is always a but!) this doesn't change the fact that I don't really know how to process the immense grief and sadness I feel every time I read an e-mail.

My shoulder is continuing to give me much grief. The pain at night seems to be getting worse, and I'm just not getting a good night sleep ever. I finally went to physio on Thursday. The gal there thinks she can fix me, so that's good. I go again on Monday and then again on Thursday. After that, who knows. She did ultrasound and some electric therapy or something.

I started Belly Dance again this week. I'm doing it twice a week this session, on Wednesdays and Thursdays. It felt good to get back to it. Sadly, my shoulder injury made many of the moves difficult or downright painful. It is surprising how much you use your shoulder or lift your arm when you're dancing. So, physio lady said to keep my arm down. HAHA - even I figured that one out.

So, not much else new. I'm still on program this week, although out of flex. Good thing new WW week starts on Monday!!

Have a healthy day bloggers!

PS: Tornwordo - my thoughts are with you and Serge while you deal with your loss. I'm really so sorry.

6 comments:

  1. I've missed your posts...glad you're back!

    So sorry about your friend's husband. My prayers go out to them.

    What exactly is wrong with your shoulder? Is it because you fell a while back? Did they check to be sure your rotator cuff isn't torn? Because you can do a ton of physio, if it's ton, that's not gonna help.

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  2. So terribly sorry to hear about your friend's husband. It's my biggest fear with my own husband considering his cancer past. It's really hard not to let it bog you down. I can't imagine how hard it must be for him and his family. It's definitely a true wake up call about what's really important in life.

    I am really glad to see you back though. I've missed your posts.

    I hope your shoulder gets fixed up real soon. Injuries are a real pain in the ass.

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  3. Im so sorry to hear about your friend losing her husband.
    there's so much loss around me right now as well I can not help but imagine what Id do in her and in some of my friends' shoes.

    it's hard not to.

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  4. Fall is a big adjustment for sure. It must be a big adjustment when kids leave the nest.

    Getting those emails must be tough. Hang in there!

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  5. Anonymous9:23 PM

    The husband of one of my old and dear friends just died, and it's a lot to process.

    That's kind of weird that the woman is including you on all these e-mail updates if you are not super close to her. I think I would just want to be told when he died.

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  6. A colleague is in Pittsburgh having a second surgery to remove tumors and they had to close him up with no progress because there is too much disease. His wife has a blog and we get the updates that way. A few days ago she posted that someone was going to have to bring their kids to Pitt...I burst into tears. It is just so sad. I can't imagine losing Mr. P. Makes me tear up at the mere typing of it, let alone anything else.

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